One of the five books (yes, I have a hard time focusing) that I’m currently reading is Death in the City by Francis Schaeffer. I really like Schaeffer’s writing, although he isn’t very easy to read. In this book he’s talking about what Christianity should look like in a post-Christian world. (It’s amazingly relevant, considering that it was written in 1969.) As he works his way through the book, Schaeffer uses two portions of scripture, one from Romans and the other from Jeremiah. In one particularly good section of the book, he’s talking about how Jeremiah stuck to his message despite the flood of opposition he faced. Schaeffer then describes the discouragement Jeremiah experienced in his work, crying out to God in a Job-like lament. This is Schaeffer’s insight:

“And you say, how can a man of God be discouraged? Anybody who asks that has never been in the midst of the battle; he understands nothing about real struggle for God. We are real men. We are on this side of the Fall. We are not perfect. We have our dreams, our psychological needs, and we want to be fulfilled. There are times of heroism as we stand firm and are faithful in preaching to men who will not listen. But there are also times when we feel overwhelmed…. If you love God and love men and have compassion for them, you will pay a real price psychologically.
So many people seem to think that if the Holy Spirit is working, then the work is easy. Don’t believe it! As the Holy Spirit works, a man is consumed. This is the record of the revivals; it is the record of those places in which God has really done something. It is not easy.” (Death in the City, Crossway books, 2002 pg 82-84)

Ok, so what’s the point? Schaeffer describes the minister of the Gospel as a man who is consumed by the Holy Spirit. What does it mean to be consumed? No, really, what does it mean to be consumed?? Maybe it means that your sole passion becomes Christ. I hope so. But then again, the crucifying of all my other passions doesn’t sound too pleasant. I truly want God to use me in a way that will bring Him glory, but as I look at myself and see all the idols on the shelf of my heart, it’s easy to be discouraged.

A friend told me that he could see God shaping me, equipping me as a pastor. I’ve thought about that, some. This friend knows many of my struggles; he sees my constant discouragement with myself; he challenges me to be what I am, a favored son of God. Maybe being consumed by the Holy Spirit begins with understanding the pervasiveness of sin and then being whispered to by the Great Comforter that God loves you, really!